catching breath: a poem

Catching breath by telle wild rose ©️ 2025
Theme song: hand me down by citizen soldier

Why does no one notice she,
I don't understand...everywhere I look there is he.
I try to run but I cannot escape, you see,
Hunted and haunted by his sins hes done to me.

He smiles while I scream and cry in sorrow
Always one step behind in his shadow
But I know the way out, I take the blade
And for once I drop the facade

He gets him the glory and the family,
While I'm all alone, unloved, nobody wants me
I'm called liar, deceiver, or worse yet
I'm believed but should just forgive and forget

The ones that remain by my side,
Can't even see past the mask I use to hide.
Or perhaps they do see and care not for my tears not to soothe my fears,
They're Too tired of my pain I've been carrying for years

They don't have the memories of the rapings, but I do,
Who else can carry this weight the way I do?
But don't celebrate yet, I'm not a winner at living
I'm a failure at death, scorned lover of dying.

Why don't I just get better they wonder,
Why can't I move on, it was years ago, they ponder.
But even shadows follow the body full of ghosts,
Like black water seeking to drown her in its coasts.

Choke the dream, destroy hope,
But no matter, I know of the best way to cope.
A different kind of drug enters my system
An old friend and she, dancing to a familiar rhythm

Rivers of the red flow,
This next act isn't for show
She takes last breath
As she finally is welcomed by death.

Psalm 147:3 ESV / 443 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds

Proverbs 3:5-6 ESV / 675 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

Psalm 34:17-20 ESV / 1,233 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful
When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all. He keeps all his bones; not one of them is broken.

Jeremiah 29:11 ESV / 823 helpful votes
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

Encouragement: there is always hope. Always a reason to keep going. God will give each of us beauty for ashes. 

they sit they wait they watch: caged bird

They sit, they wait, they watch: caged bird by telle wild rose ©️ 2025

They sit, they wait, they watch

But she never opens her mouth to sing. 

Their eyes have a look of knowing and yet…

They sit, they wait, they watch

But she never allows herself to dream. 

The catcher clipped her wings to fly, help! Yet…

They sit, they wait, they watch

as he steals everything of her being. 

Innocence stolen, future dies. Yet,

They sit, they wait, they watch

But she never opens her mouth to sing. 

Ears dull of hearing, eyes blind to seeing,

They turn away from her pain of yesteryear, and

They sit, they wait, they watch,

But she never opens her mouth to sing. 

Sitting, waiting and watching for something,

Perhaps HER to conform and fall in line, but, still,

They sit, they sit, they watch,

But she never opens her mouth to sing. 

Psalm 41:9 ESV

Even my close friend in whom I trusted, who ate my bread, has lifted his heel against me.

Psalm 42:10-11

New International Version

10 My bones suffer mortal agony

    as my foes taunt me,

saying to me all day long,

    “Where is your God?”

11 Why, my soul, are you downcast?

    Why so disturbed within me?

Put your hope in God,

    for I will yet praise him,

    my Savior and my God.

Encouragement:

Your voice is not unheard. Your broken heart is not silenced here nor unseen, I see you bleeding and so does the Father. He's the only that can heal the hurts. Turn to The God who heals you. Call upon His name. 

 

falling deeper

Telle wild rose ©️ 2025

The itch underneath my skin, scratching,

Crawling, searching for something. 

My drug is of a different sort but just as deadly,

I've been turning to it a lot lately. 

Done fighting the urge

To dig into the flesh and sin purge.

Brought down to my knees, low

But not for worship, but reaping what I sow. 

Angels and demons battle over my shoulder,

See now this thing she thinks to do, nothing shall withold her. 

Watching, waiting aimlessly around

The darkness is finally gaining ground

Photo by maten newhall unsplash

John 1:5

King James Version

5 And the light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not.

Encouragent: when you feel like giving in, don't. Hold on, your redemption draws near. 

Don't let me, let go by Telle Wild Rose

 

Photo by Mayank Dhanawade on unsplash 

Don't let me, let go a Poem by Telle Wild Rose 2025 ©

Theme song: thebandred "shadows" 

these thoughts consume me,

threaten to overtake me.

they force my hand,

ill try to hold on if i can.

cut everyone off, no one loves you,

honeyed lies they whisper, sound so sweet too.

just let go, release, 

no one will care, be free.

isolate, dungeon,

down here no friends, just demons, a legion.

i cant save me,

i cant save them either you see.

too weak to fight

something is not right,

darkenss take ahold,

i must do all of what im told 

i smile and pretend, 

no one suspects this is my end.

this is where i die, and the evil takes over,

quickly now, run for cover.

shadows choke the scream,

pain killed a dying dream.

blind and deaf,

a small taste of the shadow of death.

help me, im drowing,

please, the torment is too much, im dying.

bleed the red, go on,

break the skin, we've already won.

hate, a kind of passion,

we see you still havent learned your lesson.

wait, stop, dont go,

were just getting started with the show.

falling, fading fast,

is it over? how long will this last?

calling all saints for help, a sister to keep,

the dragon has arrived, he keeps me in his heap. 

a useless treasure,

no value to measure.

how did i ever dare for dreams?

a better life? everything and yet nothing, is as it seems.

Scripture: Psalm 23:4 ESV / 43 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

Encouragement: if you're feeling alone, unloved, rejected or the enemy is lying to you about it all, just Know God has loved you with an everlasting love, that no evil can overtake you, HE is always near.

the demon is near, what goes bump in the night (look in the mirror) by telle wild rose

 *images by chatgpt

scene 1:

i woke up in a fright, 

from a dream of what goes bump in the night 

and truly what a horrendous sight, 

the grotesque creature lurking just out of sight.

Scene 2: 

was it real or was I merely dreaming, 

I try to keep my cool but inside I'm screaming.

the horrors untold,

my soul was its to hold. 

scene 3: 

I turn on the lights in my bathroom mirror,

I peer inside in anticipation, when suddenly in abject horror, 

I see a monster looking back at me,

she's wearing a blue dress, so much blue is all I see.  

scene 4: 

was I summoned or did she summon me? 

what is this strange creature of light staring back at me? 

she looks at me as if I'm the beast, the night creature,

I stretch out my hand towards her.

scene 5: 

I'm not sure what will happen when light meets darkness,

but I must know, must take the chance with this. 

wake up! this thing is sinister,

wake up! your enemy is near, just look in the mirror!

The Demon is near, look in the mirror, by Telle Wild Rose. 

If you ever felt like your own worst enemy, you are in good company, sometimes a trick of the mind is just that, a lie, don't listen to it. 

great a many men have faced this same struggle, of the enemy of self, the struggle, the wrestling, the self hatred and even fear of what we may mess up next, The bible says this: 

Romans 7:14-25

King James Version

14 For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin.

15 For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I.

16 If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good.

17 Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.

18 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not.

19 For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.

20 Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.

21 I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me.

22 For I delight in the law of God after the inward man:

23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.

24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?

25 I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.

our hope is not found in ourselves, but in Jesus Christ our Savior, look up, our redeemer draws nigh!